This was my devotion this morning. How often do we become so convinced that we are right and destroy those we love or our brothers or sisters in Christ trying to prove that we are right, when we should back off and allow God to do the proving?
"One of the hardest things in life is allowing someone to "win" a disagreement — especially when we’re convinced that we’re right. The Word of God teaches, however, that "losing" in the eyes of the world can mean "winning" in the eyes of God.
"Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God." (Matthew 5:9)
Did you get into a disagreement with a spouse, family member, friend, or colleague? Have you decided that you’re not going to "back down"?
As Matthew 5:9 instructs, who we really are has very little to do with who gets the "last word" or what we "accomplish." After all, even non-believers win a lot of debates, and accomplish impressive things! Instead, who we really are has everything to do with how we love, treat, and unify people. In 1 Corinthians chapter 13, the Bible warns that we can speak in tongues, have prophetic powers, and give everything we have to the poor, yet still be a "useless nobody" to God.
Being "someone" to God often means surrendering our right to be "right." It also means that, occasionally, we’ll have to "lose" with people in order to "win" with God.
The devil will do anything to escalate a disagreement. He will remind us of what someone said, and how they said it. He will feed a tiny offense until it progresses into an explosive fight. That’s what he does! The devil comes to steal, kill, and destroy the unity in families, among believers, and in friendships. He recognizes the power of peace — and so should we." (Marsha DuCille)
James 3:18 promises:
"And the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace of them that make peace."
The fruit is sown of them that MAKE peace...in other words, those who work at bringing peace or making peace in situations will bear the fruit in peace. So...in the situations you are facing today, are you making peace, sowing seeds in peace or are you destroying others in the pursuit of proving that you are right?
Lord, help me to surrender my NEED or desire to be right into Your hands and help me to never destroy those that I come in contact with in my pursuit to prove how right I am!
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
Shaken, Stirred or Changed?
While sitting in service on Sunday morning, listening to our pastor preach, he told us that we needed to stir up the enthusiasm we had when The Church of God was first set in order in Oklahoma City, stir up the desire to expect God to move, and to stir up that motivation to follow God's leading and work. As he went on with the message, the thought "shaken, stirred or changed" popped into my head.
As I have thought about those three words, I realized that many, throughout the years, have had their lives shaken, by natural disaster, by national tragedy or by personal tragedies. In those moments, many will turn to Christ and to church, but given a few months separation from those events and they return to the same ole way they've always lived.
Many people sit in congregations every Sunday and they're stirred in their spirits or their emotions and they are ready to reach the world...but give 'em a few days and the cares of life will quickly distract them.
I have had my beliefs shaken to the core and am in the process of coming to know and understand why I believe the way I do. I'm not willing to believe in something just because I've heard it all my life. I'm not willing to believe in something just because that's the way the Church teaches it. I'm not willing to believe in something just because those I love, do. What I believe must be supported and lined out in the Word of God. Without that knowledge, understanding and support of His Word, my beliefs are worthless.
Weekly, my heart is stirred to action, but how often does the cares of this life choke out out that desire that was stirred in my soul?
This past Sunday's message, caused me to stop and evaluate how I really want to be. I don't want to simply be shaken or stirred, I want my life to be changed by the hand of Almighty God. I want all the impurities burned away. I want my motives and actions to be pure. I want to live a life of holiness that when I am asked about it, I can point to the Word of God and be able to share my beliefs simply so that others may see and come to know Him as their Savior too.
We are to walk humbly before our God. We are to love others as ourselves and we are to forgive as Christ has forgiven us. Some days that is a tall order...but God's grace is sufficient for all our needs and even on those days, He will grant us the grace to walk, love and forgive. So...what will you choose...stirred, shaken or changed?
Until next time...
Tammi
As I have thought about those three words, I realized that many, throughout the years, have had their lives shaken, by natural disaster, by national tragedy or by personal tragedies. In those moments, many will turn to Christ and to church, but given a few months separation from those events and they return to the same ole way they've always lived.
Many people sit in congregations every Sunday and they're stirred in their spirits or their emotions and they are ready to reach the world...but give 'em a few days and the cares of life will quickly distract them.
I have had my beliefs shaken to the core and am in the process of coming to know and understand why I believe the way I do. I'm not willing to believe in something just because I've heard it all my life. I'm not willing to believe in something just because that's the way the Church teaches it. I'm not willing to believe in something just because those I love, do. What I believe must be supported and lined out in the Word of God. Without that knowledge, understanding and support of His Word, my beliefs are worthless.
Weekly, my heart is stirred to action, but how often does the cares of this life choke out out that desire that was stirred in my soul?
This past Sunday's message, caused me to stop and evaluate how I really want to be. I don't want to simply be shaken or stirred, I want my life to be changed by the hand of Almighty God. I want all the impurities burned away. I want my motives and actions to be pure. I want to live a life of holiness that when I am asked about it, I can point to the Word of God and be able to share my beliefs simply so that others may see and come to know Him as their Savior too.
We are to walk humbly before our God. We are to love others as ourselves and we are to forgive as Christ has forgiven us. Some days that is a tall order...but God's grace is sufficient for all our needs and even on those days, He will grant us the grace to walk, love and forgive. So...what will you choose...stirred, shaken or changed?
Until next time...
Tammi
Friday, July 30, 2010
Getting over hurts...
(Some how I've managed to highlight and mess up the first paragraph, so please forgive my computer illiteracy!)
One of the things that I have struggled the most with, over the past four years, is the hurts from others and their words or actions. Now, obviously, being 47 years old, I've faced my fair share of hurtfulness from others, so there is nothing new in that, so what makes the past four years and the accompanying hurts any different? The hurts came from those that I thought were my friends, from within the Church. I expect attacks from people who are not Christians, but not from those who I have labored beside and gone through thick and thin with for years. Those kinds of attacks are usually the most fatal of blows. When you couple those kinds of blows with the plethora of changes that we have faced over the past 5 years...it brings an instability to your emotions and your soul. Yes, you may be very knowledgeable about what God's Word says and you can encourage everyone else to lean on and follow His Word, but the chaos that is raging in your heart and mind can sometimes prevent you from seeing what you KNOW is there and can prevent you from really HEARING it. You have eyes, but cannot see and ears, but cannot hear...until you are ready.
Well...that day finally came for me. We had checked into our motel room and having a migraine, I took a nap so that I would be ready to clerk the first session of our Regional Convention. When I woke up, I needed some water and bless my husband's heart, he left my water in the very hot van, so I went downstairs to get that water, hoping that sitting by the AC it would cool off enough for me to drink. Now mind you, I was still really groggy when I left the room...pretty much bouncing off the walls as I was walking down the hallways because I had no balance. As I was getting onto the elevator to go back to our room, an individual asked me a question, so I stopped to have a short conversation with this person. So you will understand, this is a person, who has caused many problems for my husband and myself, even to the extent that his actions caused so much stress that I ended up in the emergency room with heart attack symptoms. However, I had determined in my heart, long ago, that I would not treat him as he had treated us over the years, but would treat him with friendliness. Isn't that what we are supposed to do...treat others the way we want to be treated? Anyway...I got to the room and told my husband about who I had seen while I was downstairs and he asked if I had spoken to this individual. There was something in the way he asked that question that really bugged me. I went ahead and gathered my stuff and headed to the shower and while I was in there, I was praying and suddenly these scriptures hit me in the face..."But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you;" (Matthew 6:44) and "For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses." (Matthew 6:14-15) "And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgive you." (Ephesians 4:32) If smacking me with them in the shower wasn't enough, then the very first message of the convention, reinforced everything in those scriptures...God had given the same scriptures and the same points to the minister preaching to make sure I heard the message loud and clear!
So...how do you get past those hurts...
How do you know if you have achieved what God's Word tells us to do in regards to hurts and forgiveness...when you can look at that person who has wronged you and feel genuine compassion in your heart and you can be friendly without even thinking about it. When you no longer get all bent out of shape and your blood pressure doesn't rise whenever you think about the situation. That is when forgiveness has been achieved.
Have I gotten there yet? I'm still working on some things, but for the most part...I'm seeing baggage disappearing...one hurt at a time. There is one HUGE hurt that I am having a very difficult time with because of the large number of people that it affected and largely because of my over active sense of right and wrong and how things SHOULD be done. This is the hurt that has had me grieving for two years. I'm getting ready to have to face that hurt head on and I'm not looking forward to it. However, I know that God's grace is sufficient and that He is MY defender, but I have to make sure that I am dead to self and allow Him to handle it so that I don't make a mess of things. With God ALL things are possible, including the healing I need for my grieving heart.
God is a very present help in time of trouble. He is my rock, my safety, my deliverer, my healer, my sanctuary, my savior, my hope, my strength, my comforter and my FATHER. My trust is in Him and not myself. The things I have control of, I make a mess of. The things that I leave in His hands are the things that bring Him glory and honor. So be it Lord!
Until next time...
Tammi
One of the things that I have struggled the most with, over the past four years, is the hurts from others and their words or actions. Now, obviously, being 47 years old, I've faced my fair share of hurtfulness from others, so there is nothing new in that, so what makes the past four years and the accompanying hurts any different? The hurts came from those that I thought were my friends, from within the Church. I expect attacks from people who are not Christians, but not from those who I have labored beside and gone through thick and thin with for years. Those kinds of attacks are usually the most fatal of blows. When you couple those kinds of blows with the plethora of changes that we have faced over the past 5 years...it brings an instability to your emotions and your soul. Yes, you may be very knowledgeable about what God's Word says and you can encourage everyone else to lean on and follow His Word, but the chaos that is raging in your heart and mind can sometimes prevent you from seeing what you KNOW is there and can prevent you from really HEARING it. You have eyes, but cannot see and ears, but cannot hear...until you are ready.
Well...that day finally came for me. We had checked into our motel room and having a migraine, I took a nap so that I would be ready to clerk the first session of our Regional Convention. When I woke up, I needed some water and bless my husband's heart, he left my water in the very hot van, so I went downstairs to get that water, hoping that sitting by the AC it would cool off enough for me to drink. Now mind you, I was still really groggy when I left the room...pretty much bouncing off the walls as I was walking down the hallways because I had no balance. As I was getting onto the elevator to go back to our room, an individual asked me a question, so I stopped to have a short conversation with this person. So you will understand, this is a person, who has caused many problems for my husband and myself, even to the extent that his actions caused so much stress that I ended up in the emergency room with heart attack symptoms. However, I had determined in my heart, long ago, that I would not treat him as he had treated us over the years, but would treat him with friendliness. Isn't that what we are supposed to do...treat others the way we want to be treated? Anyway...I got to the room and told my husband about who I had seen while I was downstairs and he asked if I had spoken to this individual. There was something in the way he asked that question that really bugged me. I went ahead and gathered my stuff and headed to the shower and while I was in there, I was praying and suddenly these scriptures hit me in the face..."But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you;" (Matthew 6:44) and "For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses." (Matthew 6:14-15) "And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgive you." (Ephesians 4:32) If smacking me with them in the shower wasn't enough, then the very first message of the convention, reinforced everything in those scriptures...God had given the same scriptures and the same points to the minister preaching to make sure I heard the message loud and clear!
So...how do you get past those hurts...
- You love your enemies in spite of what they have done to you. Realizing that it was the enemy of your soul that instigated the hurt not the individual.
- Bless them that have created hurts by finding ways to bring a smile to their face. To bless someone means to "make happy".
- Do good to them...find ways to help, to be an encouragement.
- PRAY for them...because they were used by the enemy to cause hurt and destruction...they need God to reveal this to their heart so they may seek His forgiveness and maybe they'll also seek your forgiveness. However, even if they don't, love them anyway, because you will be blessed of God for being obedient to His Word. Two wrongs do not make a right!
- FORGIVE them! You cannot do any of the above with a clean conscience and a right heart before God without forgiveness in your heart for the one who has done you wrong.
How do you know if you have achieved what God's Word tells us to do in regards to hurts and forgiveness...when you can look at that person who has wronged you and feel genuine compassion in your heart and you can be friendly without even thinking about it. When you no longer get all bent out of shape and your blood pressure doesn't rise whenever you think about the situation. That is when forgiveness has been achieved.
Have I gotten there yet? I'm still working on some things, but for the most part...I'm seeing baggage disappearing...one hurt at a time. There is one HUGE hurt that I am having a very difficult time with because of the large number of people that it affected and largely because of my over active sense of right and wrong and how things SHOULD be done. This is the hurt that has had me grieving for two years. I'm getting ready to have to face that hurt head on and I'm not looking forward to it. However, I know that God's grace is sufficient and that He is MY defender, but I have to make sure that I am dead to self and allow Him to handle it so that I don't make a mess of things. With God ALL things are possible, including the healing I need for my grieving heart.
God is a very present help in time of trouble. He is my rock, my safety, my deliverer, my healer, my sanctuary, my savior, my hope, my strength, my comforter and my FATHER. My trust is in Him and not myself. The things I have control of, I make a mess of. The things that I leave in His hands are the things that bring Him glory and honor. So be it Lord!
Until next time...
Tammi
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Thursday, June 17, 2010
?Direction?
As soon as I finished the very first post...all inspiration fled. I've been trying to figure out where to go from that first post...what subject do I tackle first? This morning, I read something that threw me into an emotional tailspin. The Bible tells us the power of life and death are in the tongue and these days, an extension of the tongue can be the written word. I realize that most people don't set out to hurt others by what they say or write...but we also don't stop to think about how our words will affect those who hear or read them. Words have the power to inspire, to encourage, to strengthen, to guide and they have the power to destroy, to discourage and to lead astray.
I realized, even as I read the words, that the emotions I was experiencing, came from the enemy of my soul. I refused to allow myself to dwell on the words, but I still felt such a heaviness and a feeling of failure enveloped me. When the words would cross my mind, I would tell myself that the individual would never have said anything to hurt me or to make me feel this way, to remember where the attack was coming from...but the sadness threatened to drown me. Just as the enemy used words, carelessly chosen, to attack me, my Lord and God, used words carefully chosen to remind me that I may never see the results of my labor until I reach heaven's shores, but I am to continue to be faithful and to trust Him. These are the words that He sent to me through a precious "adopted" daughter:
I realized, even as I read the words, that the emotions I was experiencing, came from the enemy of my soul. I refused to allow myself to dwell on the words, but I still felt such a heaviness and a feeling of failure enveloped me. When the words would cross my mind, I would tell myself that the individual would never have said anything to hurt me or to make me feel this way, to remember where the attack was coming from...but the sadness threatened to drown me. Just as the enemy used words, carelessly chosen, to attack me, my Lord and God, used words carefully chosen to remind me that I may never see the results of my labor until I reach heaven's shores, but I am to continue to be faithful and to trust Him. These are the words that He sent to me through a precious "adopted" daughter:
More Than You’ll Ever Know
Watermark
Something brought you to my mind today
I thought about the funny ways you make me laugh
And yet I feel like it's okay to cry with you
Something about just being with you
When I leave I feel like I've been near God
And that's the way it ought to be...
CHORUS:
'Cause you've been more than a friend to me
You fight off my enemies
'Cause you've spoken the Truth over my life
And you'll never know what it means to me
Just to know you've been on your knees for me
Oh, you have blessed my life
More than you'll ever know, yeah, yeah, yeah
More than you'll ever know, yeah, yeah, yeah
You had faith, when I had none
You prayed God would bring me a brand new song
When I didn't think I could find the strength to sing
And all the while I'm hoping that I'll
Do the kind of praying for you that you've done for me
And that's the way it ought to be...
You have carried me
You have taken upon a burden that wasn't your own
And may the blessing return to you
A hundredfold, oh yeah...
A hundredfold, oh yeah...
The moral of this lesson, for me anyway, is to carefully choose the words that I let fly...I need to speak life rather than death to the hearer of my words. I need to encourage, strengthen, inspire and guide the hearer to truth...otherwise, I'm just wasting my breath. So...what do I do with the hurt? That is the topic that I'll have to study and post about next.
God also chose to use the song "I Am" by Mark Schultz to really minister to me throughout the day. I woke up with the words playing in my head and every time I listened to it, I just sobbed, out of thankfulness, that He is the I AM and the healer of the broken among so many other things. The song is included below this post.
Until next time...choose to speak life rather than death!
Tammi
Saturday, June 12, 2010
Life changes in the blink of an eye!
If I haven't learned that life changes in the blink of an eye enough in the past five years, I've had it reinforced in the past two minutes. I had over 500 words typed in this post and with the stroke of one key...lost it all. So...what will I do with this momentary irritation? I guess I could grumble about how Windows 7, while better than Vista, still manages to cause "grrrrrrrrrr" to come out of my mouth many times a day, or I could just get on with the whole purpose of this post...think I'll just get on with the post.
Life changes are things that happen on a daily basis. Some face more changes, more often than others. Some changes are quite drastic, others, not so much. Some changes are life altering, while others are mere interruptions. For me...the past 5 years have had some drastic changes and several of them life-altering. One moment, I was a stay-at-home wife and mom, the next, a pastor's wife being sent to pastor in a foreign country. Suddenly, my husband went from just being a pastor, to being an overseer of four states and half a country. One moment, everything was going great, the next, felt like we were about to be lynched. One moment, everyone wants to be your best friend, the next, no one is speaking to you. One moment, you have a strong support group of people that you have fought side-by-side with, the next, you find out that relationship isn't what you thought it was. This blog isn't about ranting and raving about how someone has treated me badly or the awful things that anyone has said or done. It is about life changing and throwing curves balls and how we deal with them.
So many people think that if you serve in a leadership position within the Church, then somehow, you never have any problems or struggles and if you do, you are already so holy and have all the answers, so it really isn't a struggle after all. The fact is and I've learned this the hard way...being in ministry or leadership positions doesn't mean that you have it all figured out and that you never have any problems. However, most in those positions, will never allow you to see them deal with the problems or struggles they have because they have been drilled that they are to be the example of holiness, of victorious living, so even though they are falling apart on the inside, you'll only see a smile on the outside. Are they being hypocritical? Not intentionally...for most, they are sincerely trying to be an encouragement, for others, it becomes a pride issue...never let anyone see that you aren't as perfect as they think you are.
For the past two years, I've had to deal with frustration, anger, bitterness, grieving and just about the time I think I've got it completely uprooted and dealt with, a name, a situation, a comment, or unstable hormones, triggers a new round of those old feelings. I don't want those feelings in my life. They cause my chest to tighten, my blood pressure to go up and make me depressed. So...a few days ago, as I was begging God to take them, once and for all...He impressed upon my heart to blog about what He was leading me to study and what He was going to teach me. The one question I have asked God over and again since I was five years old is, "What is my purpose on this earth?" A very big question to be asked initially by such a small child and while He hasn't exactly stuck a post-it to my forehead with the answer written on it...I get the impression that my life is to be an open book to help others find their way to healing, deliverance and most importantly, to find their way to an eternity with Him.
I realize that by leaving this blog totally public, that there will be some who are just curious, some who are lookie-lou's, who are looking for something to gossip about, some who want to see what I have to say so they can judge or criticize, but there will also be those who are struggling and are hoping to find answers and some who will offer encouragement, godly advice and will be praying that this blog is a blessing to others. For those in the negative category, what you do is between you and God...His Word is your judge, not me, I'll love you anyway. For those in the positive category...thank you...I'm going to need all the prayers and encouragement I can get as I embark on this.
So...I'm inviting you to come take a journey with me as I find my way home.
Tammi
Life changes are things that happen on a daily basis. Some face more changes, more often than others. Some changes are quite drastic, others, not so much. Some changes are life altering, while others are mere interruptions. For me...the past 5 years have had some drastic changes and several of them life-altering. One moment, I was a stay-at-home wife and mom, the next, a pastor's wife being sent to pastor in a foreign country. Suddenly, my husband went from just being a pastor, to being an overseer of four states and half a country. One moment, everything was going great, the next, felt like we were about to be lynched. One moment, everyone wants to be your best friend, the next, no one is speaking to you. One moment, you have a strong support group of people that you have fought side-by-side with, the next, you find out that relationship isn't what you thought it was. This blog isn't about ranting and raving about how someone has treated me badly or the awful things that anyone has said or done. It is about life changing and throwing curves balls and how we deal with them.
So many people think that if you serve in a leadership position within the Church, then somehow, you never have any problems or struggles and if you do, you are already so holy and have all the answers, so it really isn't a struggle after all. The fact is and I've learned this the hard way...being in ministry or leadership positions doesn't mean that you have it all figured out and that you never have any problems. However, most in those positions, will never allow you to see them deal with the problems or struggles they have because they have been drilled that they are to be the example of holiness, of victorious living, so even though they are falling apart on the inside, you'll only see a smile on the outside. Are they being hypocritical? Not intentionally...for most, they are sincerely trying to be an encouragement, for others, it becomes a pride issue...never let anyone see that you aren't as perfect as they think you are.
For the past two years, I've had to deal with frustration, anger, bitterness, grieving and just about the time I think I've got it completely uprooted and dealt with, a name, a situation, a comment, or unstable hormones, triggers a new round of those old feelings. I don't want those feelings in my life. They cause my chest to tighten, my blood pressure to go up and make me depressed. So...a few days ago, as I was begging God to take them, once and for all...He impressed upon my heart to blog about what He was leading me to study and what He was going to teach me. The one question I have asked God over and again since I was five years old is, "What is my purpose on this earth?" A very big question to be asked initially by such a small child and while He hasn't exactly stuck a post-it to my forehead with the answer written on it...I get the impression that my life is to be an open book to help others find their way to healing, deliverance and most importantly, to find their way to an eternity with Him.
I realize that by leaving this blog totally public, that there will be some who are just curious, some who are lookie-lou's, who are looking for something to gossip about, some who want to see what I have to say so they can judge or criticize, but there will also be those who are struggling and are hoping to find answers and some who will offer encouragement, godly advice and will be praying that this blog is a blessing to others. For those in the negative category, what you do is between you and God...His Word is your judge, not me, I'll love you anyway. For those in the positive category...thank you...I'm going to need all the prayers and encouragement I can get as I embark on this.
So...I'm inviting you to come take a journey with me as I find my way home.
Tammi
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